Changes

I am not wanting to go into gross detail on this. But we are changing daycare providers. Let's jump back about a year ago, shall we? December of 2009 we decided to place our kiddos in a daycare. Kaitlyn was in a daycare until she was 20 months old and we switched to a friend watching her. By December of 2009 she was 2.5 and LJ was 10 months old. Daycare was the best option as our friend moved. It was all going well, until it wasn't. That's really how it always goes. I could tell something was up when the attendence of the kids went downhill. We prepared to change providers but there is something that kept me there. Kaitlyn routine. She had friends there. LJ had two people in his room that JUST LOVED him and I know how much he loved them. I tore my stomach apart having to move them but then the daycare announced it was closing so really, I didn't have to make the decision. They started a new daycare May 2010. It also was great until it wasn't. We thought about leaving. But again, TORE ME APART. The teachers there loved my kids....loved like their own kiddos. They would text pics of the kids to me through out the day. I became even "hang out when the kids aren't there" friend with one of the teachers.
But there was an event and it caused us to question if we should keep our kids there. Husband was set on moving them but it made me sick. I knew it would upset the teachers...there could be the possibly that my friend wouldn't be able to keep her job there as the attendence would be too low. It. made. me. sick. BUT you have to do what is right for you kids. Annoucement this morning: daycare is down sizing. We didn't make the cut, we were given termination papers. Phew, I didn't have to initiate the break up. Teacher was crying, she didn't want to have to downsize but she couldn't afford assistants. I am still feeling ill. I know we HAVE to change now but I hate that my kids have to start all over again. They will lose their daily friends (of course we do plan on play dates...but it isn't an everyday thing). Kait, one who lives by a schedule, will be completely devistated. LJ won't care really. I feel sad, bitter, angry, and betrayed in a bit. But it is over. We start new. I love where the kids will be going. This will work out for the best.

Does your family know?

Does my family know that I keep a blog? I have never told them. If they found their way here, I have no idea how. This blog started off long before I was pregnant with LJ. I think I passed around the URL here and there but it went blank for a long time. Then I picked it back up. It wasn't so family could keep up with me. It wasn't to share hundreds of pics of my kids and tell everyone how I raise them or what sort of educational things we do around our house. Honestly, I needed a place to put my feelings out there. I want them to be read.....but not by my family. Strange? It is just too real for them to know how I feel about things. I have a hard time expressing or admitting being sensitive or struggling with my son's health. I am VERY good at being strong at the Dr's office...in front of families...in front of friends. It is when I come here and really just lay it out there that I cry. It is theraputic for me. My target audience is me. Though I hope that other heart moms can come here and sort of relate. To know their feelings are validated through others and to let you know that the "strong mom" in the room next to you on the cardiac floor isnt' as strong as you think she is.

Yes, there are nice CVS posts in here too. Why? Not sure. For a while my most read blog was about the Amazon diaper deal. So I figured that some of you are interested in that sort of thing and I kind of get my kicks on getting good deals here and there..I also think it helps to lighten the mood of this blog.

So for now, I don't advertize the blog. I don't mind if you link to me or if I am listed somewhere. But as for family???......I'll probably just keep this between you and me. A cutsie blog will be listed under another URL though this one really does need a few pics here and there ;)

To #3 or to not #3

And by number 3........ I totally mean adding another kiddo to the family. I can't believe I just put it out there like that. As always, I am conflicted. Here are the thoughts running through my head, in no particular order

My kiddos are getting so big. Kait will be 4 and LJ will 2 be in April. They are walking and talking and Kaitlyn acts like she Will be a legal adult soon.

I miss snugly baby time.

I miss being pregnant

I miss feeling a baby kick

3 kids would mean buying a bigger vehicle....even...dare I say, a minivan *gasp!*

3 kids would mean 5 more years of daycare

I love the delivery. Granted I never had a real delivery just c-sections but I do LOVE L.O.V.E those first few days..even if it was terribly stressful with a heart baby. There is just something about that newness...that feeling of brand new.

I loved my ob and midwife.

I would have to find a new OB and midwife since my insurance has changed.

I have to worry about having enough paid leave. Geez, grad school was great in that respect.

What if it is another heart baby.

How will my family/friends feel who have been trying like crazy to have JUST one and here I am trying to have a third?

Do I really want to give up sleeping at night?

How will we arrange the kids in their rooms? one would have to share with the baby and from experience, kid + baby in the same room was not always easy.

Traveling with three, especially a baby, makes it hard.

We want to start vacationing with the kids.

But LJ is my baby.......I look at him and see my little baby and I am not sure I am ready to give that title away. How can I take that from him?

Kait is an amazing sister and LJ LOVES babies.

Some days I feel like two kids are enough and I feel soooo complete.

Some days I feel like I have so much more love to give...I know it's there.

We did give away A LOT of our baby items.

we have to travel to see our parents and I feel like a big enough burden having parents bored the four of us....

Who doesn't love a baby?

Back and forth, back and forth. we haven't settled which way to go. I just keep feeling that if I didn't want another it would be a sure thing...that I would just definitely know and this thought of baby #3 wouldn't' keep creeping up...but so many reservations....

Walgreens

Walgreens has started (well started a while back) their own bonus dollar type of deal called Register Rewards.

The good side:

No card needed. The money back is printed up at the end of your transaction which means you can keep going back and cashing in on the same deal.

Walgreens has more convenient hours (ie I can go on my way to work since CVS doesn't open until 8 am and I am already at work by then).

The bad side:

Because you can cash in so much, the items sell out FAST!

Register rewards are only good for 1-2 weeks!! Yes you read that correctly. What that means is that you can't really stock pile them.

They do not typically have items where you get equal amounts of rr back. CVS typically has one or more a week.

The selection of items that have register rewards is quite limited and what you get back isn't close to what you spend on SOME things. Others are not so bad.

So here and there you can find good deals. Two weeks ago they had six items that were $3 with $3 back in rewards. The issue is these past two weeks, not really anything good with the rewards (ie buy a $10 get $3 back) and I am sure they planned it that way.

All in all, I will probably use them but not as much as CVS. Maybe keep $3 - $5 in rewards around but not more than that since it would be a waste of money. Hopefully they step it up a bit and it gets a bit better.

I shouldn't be this excited....

I shouldn't be this excited to get a new printer BUT I AM! Using part of our tax return we purchased a laser printer.

While they cost a bit more than inkjet (we paid $99 for a black and white) and the toner can be a bit more (I think around $90) I get about 1000 times more pages printed per toner cartrige. Why, you may ask? Two reasons. 1. Printing off worksheets for Kaitlyn. It might sounds too white-picket-fence-ish but Kaitlyn loves to learn. She does. I have to convince her to stop doing worksheets. I have found great things on line for to her to do! 2. COUPONS! Not only can I get my coupon fix in my Sunday paper but I can now find even better ones on line :) Makes me happy!

I might do coupon match ups on here but not quite sure. It's a lot of work, and to be honest, not sure if I can keep it up online.

I AM LUCKY

I am lucky:

My heart baby will be two in less than a month.

He hasn't been overnight at a hospital in nearly a year.

LJ is walking, talking, laughing, and playing with his sister.

LJ sleeps in his own bed, yes bed. No more crib.

LJ loves his momma. He always wants to be near me and snuggle with me. He can't get enough of me.

And while LJ is not as advanced as his peers, he is still advancing.

Did I mention, no overnight hospital stays in a long time?

Kaitlyn is growing up to be quite the young lady.

She is wicked intelligent.

I get to watch Kaitlyn read to her brother while he sits patiently by listening to everything she has to tell him.

I have a great pictures and video of both of my kids dancing their hearts out to Dance Central.

My kids are not on long term medications right now.

LJ's next appointment is for the ENT, not the cardiologist.

I have a fantastic husband who has been incredibly supportive and loving.

My days are currently not spent sitting beside at a hospital.

The sounds of beeping machines are just a memory.

I do not have any major medical decisions to make in the near future.

My kids have fantastic health insurance and I do not have to worry about what my kids' might need. They are covered.

At the end of the day, my biggest struggle is getting my kids to fall asleep...and that isn't a such a big struggle.

Last night, it came to me. I am pretty darn lucky. It is easy to throw myself and LJ a pity party. His life, our life, is not an easy one but we are incredibly lucky where we sit right now. It could be drastically different right now. Our lows could be even lower. My kiddos are both home and doing relatively quite well. We have quality family time and the love between us all is just so abundant. So I will take these moments and cherish them because it could all change...but for now, we are doing OK.

CVS week of March 6 2011

Not much is going on at CVS as far as easy extra bucks (eb). Nothing that I will be rushing out for.

If you like nail polish (of course this week after my daughter conned me out of some last week) is on sale. $3.99 each with $3 back. So makes them sort of like 99 cents.

Besides that, mostly just buy so many dollars of one brand of product and get so much back in eb.

There is a soda deal that isn't too bad 4/$13 with $3 back. We are pretty stocked on soda so I am holding off this week.